Danny Katz: A new card-collecting craze has swept the nation

Footy cards used to be a big thing back in the 1970s. They came in bubblegum packs and kids would collect them and swap them and play a game called “Flicks”, where they flicked their cards towards a wall and whoever’s card got closest won everyone else’s cards – then a fight broke out and someone got bopped in the head.

Footy card-flicking was a really rough contact sport: kids needed to wear a mouthguard and protective foam headgear.

Pokemon cards were a huge thing in the 2000s. Kids would buy them from the local milk bar then swap with each other using sophisticated financial trading strategies – they’d negotiate bulk-deal Pikachu sell-offs, they’d stage in-house Snorlax auctions with no reserve, they’d attempt to short-sell devalued Jigglypuffs before re-buying at a tidy profit.

And these were third-graders who didn’t know how to tie their shoelaces yet, and couldn’t recite the alphabet without getting stuck on that tricky L-M-N-O-P bit.

But footy cards and Pokemon cards are not big things anymore. A whole new card-collecting craze has swept the nation, capturing the imagination of Aussie children everywhere. At least once every day, kids will go out to their mailbox, reach inside and collect a whole new set of real-estate junk mail cards – up to 100 a week.

It’s exciting: they never know what they’re going to get. Sometimes it’s real-estate-agent business cards. Sometimes it’s upcoming auction postcards. Every now and then it could be an extremely rare real-estate-agency calendar fridge magnet (highly collectable and worth at least 10 “free and confidential property appraisal” flyers).

Eagerly waiting for the postman. Photo: Stocksy

In a nation obsessed with property and auctions, children have gone nuts for real-estate cards – they wanna collect ’em all! Kids get together in schoolyards, hoping to complete teams of real-estate-agents, rifling through each other’s card stacks, saying “Got it … got it … want it … got it …” And on each card, there’s a photo of a sales consultant wearing the team-uniform: dark blazer, stripped shirt, painfully forced smile.

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Kids hang out in backyards, trading cards, trying to work out a fair deal: “Okay, I’ll give you two licensed agents for a property consultant.

“Nuh, that’s a rip off!”

“What about this valuable director-auctioneer?”

“Okay, throw in a ‘we have buyers looking for properties in your area’ leaflet and it’s a swapsy!”

Kids sit around at home, poring over cards, memorising all the on-field player-stats of their favourite agents.  “Name: Stephanie. Position: Senior property manager. Skills: Enthusiastic, experienced and highly motivated. Goals: To achieve optimum results and help match her clients to their dream home or investment!”

You might even see kids playing games of Flicks, just like kids used to do in the 1970s, competing to see who can flick their card closest to the wall. But they prefer to play against an immaculately tuck-pointed wall. With a highly desirable north-east aspect. And surrounded by a delightful low-maintenance garden that truly redefines the meaning of “family” and “outdoor-living”.