Josh Thomas talks about one of the most "queer-friendly" suburbs in Melbourne

It’s five minutes before my interview with Melbourne actor-comedian-writer Josh Thomas when I realise we will be speaking over a video call. When I tell him I had hurried to put on makeup, he quips, “Nothing’s going to happen between us either way”. 

He’s stating the obvious, of course – made even more-so by the title of his new Audible podcast: How To Be Gay. 

It’s not actually a how-to but something that evolved because “I was really interested in having conversations with other queer people and comparing notes. For me, it was a good chance to listen to people, which I’m not typically very good at!” Thomas says.

The comedian, writer and actor, best known for his TV series Please Like Me, admits that straight people weren’t part of the audience he was pitching to for the podcast, but they could still learn some stuff. 

There’s information for couples who can’t have a baby the traditional way and “a lot of queer wisdom about monogamy, the advantages of being non-monogamous, and polyamory – straight people are so skittish about those conversations! But there’s a lot in it.” 

The other draw-card is the line-up of people. Writers David Sedaris and Dan Savage provided some fan-man moments for Thomas: “Dan’s book Savage Love was next to the toilet when I was growing up! They were people I really looked to, to see what it was like to be queer.” 

Apart from firing questions at others, he also reveals small bits about himself, including how he told his parents he was gay, and spent his early romantic years in relationships with girls. 

Certain aspects were challenging; Thomas chose not to interview a potential subject – a gay conversion therapist – because after their initial conversation, Thomas decided “he was gross”. 

He adds that “I was really surprised how much religion came up, because I didn’t grow up with religion. And the kind of torture that [can sometimes be] done to gay people in the name of religion is so full-on … I didn’t realise that for some people that it was such a struggle, that they were going to disappoint God.”

In another episode, he meets Chechnyan refugee Angel Joy who had to flee their country after its anti-gay purge because he faced the prospect of torture for his homosexuality.  

Thomas is the first to say that he’s fortunate to live between Melbourne and Los Angeles – cities where it is much easier to be yourself. 

“It’s really hard to be queer if you’re not in a neighbourhood that loves queer people. In Australia, I live in Collingwood, and in Los Angeles, I live in West Hollywood, but living in those neighbourhoods is very expensive,” he says. 

He spends three months of the year in Melbourne, and still considers Australia home, despite living most of his life away. 

“Australians are so funny. I find them much easier to get along with. People in LA, they lie a lot. I find that really weird. Everyone’s hustling in the whole city. People aren’t living for the moment; they’re living for their five year plan,” he says.

“In Melbourne, everyone’s just trying to find a nice bit of brunch, and that’s the top priority.” 

How to be Gay is available now on Audible