'Some call it chaotic but I call it home': Why Australian Lisa Morrow moved to Istanbul

Lisa Morrow never felt like Australia was home.

Physically, it was, for some time. Until her early 40s, Morrow lived and worked in Sydney, but there was something about it that never felt settled; never felt like home.

“Moving to Turkey was less of a decision than a natural progression,” Morrow says.

She spent three months in 1990 in the tiny, almost prehistoric Turkish town of Goreme, where a sense of belonging enveloped her. Six years later, she went back again.

“I travelled through Turkey with my husband Kim in 1996, and he felt the same attraction to the country and the people. On our return to Australia, we tried to settle down but the pull of Turkey was strong,” she says.

For a few years, the couple went back and forth between continents, teaching English in Istanbul and Kayseri in Cappadocia. They made friends, created a life for themselves thousands of kilometres from Australia and realised, after many years, that they each had one foot in either country.

So, how does a Sydney-born sociologist and writer find herself drawn to Turkey in such a way that Istanbul eventually became home?

“[In 2010] we sat down and acknowledged we had more friends in Istanbul than in Sydney. Whenever we weren’t in Istanbul, we missed our Turkish friends and the lifestyle more than we’ve ever missed Australia. I love the energy and vibrancy of Istanbul – some call it chaotic, but I call it home,” she says.

“The mad nights out that begin with a glass of tea with one friend, dinner with another group, and end with coffee and dessert at a cafe overlooking the Bosphorus with someone else who hadn’t been able to meet up earlier.

“The fact that everyone has to be up early for work doesn’t stop us from staying out late. Weekends are spent going on picnics, walking along the waterfront after four-hour-long Sunday breakfasts with friends, or sightseeing around the city means I often look forward to Monday because then I can rest.”

Morrow knows there is a stark difference between her two worlds. Her home now is void of the kind of structure and control she became so used to in Australia, though the bustling nature of Istanbul certainly has had an impact on her identity since the move.

“I’ve always used planning and structure to control my environment, and that doesn’t fit with Turkey. Often plans get made at the last minute, arrangements change frequently, and I’ve had to learn to be flexible and just go with the moment.

“Even now I’m not always successful at that, so I do sometimes get frustrated and disappointed, however, that’s outweighed by the joy of being with friends and we laugh until our sides ache,” she says.

Of course, living in a city not known for its social progression isn’t without its flaws, though Morrow is pragmatic about its impact on her, arguing she cannot single-handedly reform a city’s social relations.

“I think more about what I’m going to wear depending on who I’m going to be with and try not to get annoyed when men direct their comments to my husband even if I’m the one speaking.

“I know I can’t force equality on men who’ve only ever lived very traditional lives,” she says, going on to say she is equal parts unperturbed by the prospect of danger. After all, she says, danger and violence come in many forms, in many cities, in many worlds.

“In many ways, I feel much safer in Istanbul than in Sydney. There are few if any drug or alcohol-fuelled crimes. No matter the time of night there’s always somewhere open, and the transport links are good, so there’s not a lot of standing around alone on dark streets. When protests do take place, you know in advance and can choose to avoid those locations. Despite the events of the past few years, most Istanbul neighbourhoods are pretty safe.”

For Morrow, home now has far less to do with geography, and far more to do with how a place makes her feel.

“I’ve never really been able to define home, but I now know it’s where I feel most myself. Even with an imperfect grasp of the language, a different cultural background and no religious similarities, this is where I can be the best version of me, the one that makes me most happy.

“Turkey is where I’ve found people who value those things in me.”