Why it's important that adult children living at home pay board

• A lesson in independence begins at home
• Australian adults who still live with their parents
• I’m 41 and have moved back in with my parents

Unless you’ve been living under a rock, (which is highly likely, given the property crisis) you might have noticed that more and more fully grown adults are living with their parents. The most recent numbers from the Australian Bureau of Statistics suggests that over half of adults, aged between 18 and 24, still live with their parents.

The ABS points to a “delay in a range of life events” and it’s true that we are getting married and having children later. And then there’s university attendance, which has boomed in the last 40 years.

Then, perhaps most deflating of all, the two pieces of news that arrived this week. The first, was that rental properties in Australia’s cities are now officially unaffordable. So, unless you feel like sharing with upwards of a dozen other young adults in an abandoned shed north of nowhere near uni, you’re probably going to stick with mum and dad. The other was that wages are at a record low. So, spare a thought for young adults; they are less likely to be “bludging” than simply stuck.

A report last year seemed to confirm this when it found that those adults living with parents were among the most unhappy young people in Australia, to which every dad replied, “I don’t know why! You’ve got a roof over your head!”

And then every young adult sighed loudly, and pursed their lips.

I get it, I really do. When I was a youth in the early 2000s, I lived with my parents. This is before Millennials were studied like the fabulous peacocks they are. Back in my day they didn’t call it “Boomeranging” and they didn’t think about why, if a person was studying full-time, or had begun work at an entry-level job, they had zero chance of making enough money to live alone. Once I scored that entry level job, I moved out. Then I discovered that living in Sydney’s East on $500 a week was a virulent fantasy and quickly scuttled back home.

I always paid board, mind you. A token amount. I agree with the premise; it boosts independence, financial responsibility and self-esteem. So, let’s mark that down as a surplus in the “Personal Growth and General Life Satisfaction” column.

Spare a thought for young adults; they are less likely to be ‘bludging’ than simply stuck. Photo: Stocksy

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• A lesson in independence begins at home
• Australian adults who still live with their parents
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And then let’s be real and admit that it’s not so much about personal growth as it is about your poor mother not feeling like she is still being taken for granted 22 years after your birth. I’m saying mother here, because according to statistics, mothers do almost twice the amount of housework that fathers do.

It’s strange, isn’t it, how fathers generally want children to stay for as long as they need, while mothers are furiously folding the washing you said you’d do.

Oh, you said you’d take care of your own clothes, but then there’s a last-minute assignment due … at the university bar. You have no idea why your parents care about how messy your room is, I mean they can just close the door! Yes, they can most certainly close the door to one of the rooms in their own house. The same one they had hoped they could turn into a computer room.

Oh, yes, they should totally treat you like the adult you are – unless you need to borrow the car immediately because your crush just texted. At 1am. Whatever! Why do they care what time you get home?

Paying board boosts independence, financial responsibility and self-esteem. Photo: Trinette Reed Photography

Yeah, you know what’s weird? The number of times I’ve texted flatmates, and later, my husband, to see what time that person is coming home. The difference is that it’s not as emotionally loaded, most likely because I’ve never disciplined these people, I didn’t teach them how to go to the toilet; so there’s nothing to prove in terms of independence.

Of course, there are those who get along fabulously with their parents (I’m betting the homes in these cases are palatial). And once you’ve left and come back, the gratitude levels tend to go up. Especially if you’ve been living with hygienically-challenged room mates who enjoy having loud and passionate sexual relations with their partner in the room next to your own.

But all in all, it can be a challenging period. And, while it’s true that the youth of today is hemmed in by a hostile property market, a lousy economy and the fact that they’re living in one of the world’s most expensive cities, it’s not easy on the parents, either.

So, if you’re a parent and feeling guilty about asking for cash, don’t. It’s not board they are paying you, it’s recompense for putting up with a person who demands you be a super lenient landlord / housekeeper / lawyer / uber driver / counsellor and occasionally friend.

And if you’re a youth feeling ripped-off by life, don’t. This is just a season and it will pass. Before you know it, you’ll have a house of your own with a partner and children and you’ll be wishing you paid a teeny $100 a week for what you’ll wistfully look back on as among the most enjoyable years of your life.