The Block 2015: Dean and Shay win final room reveal and auction advantage

We’ve made it – the last full day on The Block.

Over three months of renovating, the couples have hiked about 12 million steps up precarious Hotel Saville scaffolding – and I’ve drunk about 12,000 litres of pinot while watching every last nail get hammered in.

The producers are not letting the teams off lightly, even as the cameramen are preparing to pack up.

Late nights and early mornings are in order until the bitter end.

If the couples don’t make hundreds of thousands of dollars come auction day, there will be mutiny.

But until then, the dramahhhh must go on.

Suzi and Vonni’s master bedroom in the challenge apartment, which they are all working on for the winner’s booty of a new car and the right to choose auction order, is a thoroughfare for the tradies.

All this to and fro – it’s busier than the queue for the loos at Jupiters Casino after a dodgy all-you-can-eat buffet – is irritating the Gold Coast gals.

But they need not worry for long – tradies are a rare commodity in this episode.

With money running out, the contestants cannot afford to pay any more strapping men with tool belts. Which spoils it a bit for all us red-blooded Block watchers.

Tradies Gone Too Soon

We’ll miss Corey, who belonged more in a Christian Dior cologne ad than at a carpentry table.

Don’t forget Matty – he delivers a sledgehammer to the heart.

Or this hipster, for all those who like their boy to be ironic and handy around the house.

Plus Ben, who Whitney and Andy fired (c’mon baby, light my fire).​

​Honorable mention – the Salvos Store guy from episode 13.

Helping to make a difference.

Someone else having a hormonal spell is Tinderling Andy. It’s almost over but he’s upset by one final, high-pressure task.

He’s huddled away and tinkering on a mobile, as spackling and jackhammering goes on around him. Luke cannot believe Andy’s capitulation.

And Suzi – after three months of renovating – has discovered a genius, time-saving device called an electric sander.

“Nobody told us you could actually get an electric sander,” she says.

But she’s still mixing paint the old school way.

Ebony has popped to the Aldi for some groceries to decorate the kitchen for judging, including a carton of bran – obviously for the constipated elderly downsizer market.

If they’ve learnt one thing over the past 90 days of hard-yakka renovating, it’s to always consider the buyer.

There’s only half an hour to go. Quick, nicely position that crappy pine cone we found on the nature strip!

Geez, budgets are tighter than Suzi’s singlets.

Tools down!

Everyone is (pretending to be) sad and nostalgic, so host Scotty Cam helps the teams make a memoir box/time capsule.

Whitney throws in a cheeseburger, remembering when an argumentative Suzi said she should shut up and eat a burger.

Someone says it will rot and won’t last. Haven’t they seen that McDonald’s documentary? It’ll outlast humanity.

Vonni and Suzi choose something to symbolise their bosoming, um, oops, blossoming journey of friendship and renovation.

So Suzi, a former Penthouse Pet of the Year, throws in her autographed bra.

A burger and a centrefold’s lingerie. A drunk leaving a nearby Chapel Street nightclub is going to think they’ve found buried treasure.

Judges arrive to critique the final rooms. Then I bet they are off to the pub.

And they’re in a love-in sort of mood, with everyone getting high praise.

Suzi and Vonni have created a master bedroom, with pine cone decor and creepy, The Blair Witch Project stick lamps.

But the judges are frothing over the OTT cushion arrangement.

Caro and Kingi lumped a triple treat of study, laundry and powder room with a terrazzo something-or-other.

Dean and Shay create a sherbet dream living room with magazine straps on the wall. Neale Whitaker hates them, but Darren Palmer says they are so hot right now (note to Darren: we didn’t hear enough of that phrase this season).

Given the dining area, Whitney and Andy hit their straps too late and deliver their best room of the entire series.

Luke and Ebony’s kitchen is a showstopper.

Everyone gets mammoth scores but Dean and Shay smash it, securing three 10s, the keys to a Suzuki – which will sit in their garage for the penthouse’s new owner – and the right to the choose their auction order.

And that is all that’s left to do – sell the apartments, make squillions of dollars, become the next Tonia Todman/brand ambassador for rugs or air-conditioners, and start a decor blog.

Cheers to everyone for surviving another season.

You are all winners.