Toasteroid Kickstarter lets you burn art into your breakfast

Is breakfast failing to hold your attention? Does the even, unwavering light brown sheen of your toasted bread make your soul cry out from lack of stimulation? Do you want a meal that embraces your creativity, using something other than artisanal porridge bowls?

Good news! For $US59 ($76 Australian, or $68.50 more expensive than that basic toaster from Kmart) you can sponsor the Toasteroid Kickstarter. It’s a lot more exciting than your standard model because it enables you to burn designs and text into your toast.

You’re not the boss of me, breakfast! The Toasteroid can be used to send totally not-annoying reminders.

It’s not just smiley-emojis or your bog-standard Hello Kitty cartoon, either. Using the Toasteroid companion mobile app, connected to the toaster via Bluetooth, you can create your own bread-a-sketch, choose from an existing design, or get a grainy print-out (haaaaa) of the weather forecast.

Alternatively, if you want to send an edible telegram to your cohabiting loved one – never fear, you can do that too. The makers suggest a cheerful “Happy Birthday” message, or a perhaps a slightly more ominous “Pay Bills” as an “edible reminder to your absent-minded other half”. Because how did we manage the modern family unit without the ability to nag via a dietary staple?

In terms of other features, the Toasteroid claims to have some very exacting toast-browning controls and takes a variety of slice thicknesses, which seems fairly useful and comes with your average, non-printing kitchen appliance.

If you’re interested, pop over to their fundraiser for more information on how toast can apparently be far, far more fun.

You’re not the boss of me, breakfast! The Toasteroid can be used to send totally not-annoying reminders. Photo: Toasteroid Kickstarter Project